(Sorry I haven’t posted in a while, but I have been crazy busy with the Holidays!)
My topic tonight is on families. Why? Well, I have been thinking since Thanksgiving about how wonderful it is to see and be with family. I had such a great time with my family on Thanksgiving and I think it’s a shame that it doesn’t happen more often. We all have super busy lives and sometimes its just plain hard to find the time to get everyone together to enjoy each other’s company.
I really have to say that despite the hardships and the periodical thoughts of, “ Why don’t I have this?” Why is it so hard to ___________?” “Why do they have to be like that?” and everything else, we really have to start thinking about how blessed we truly are. Look at the kids in our life, our spouse or significant other, our siblings, parents, grandparents, etc. They are all special and unique and you are blessed to be included in their lives and them in yours. We age and decease a lot more quickly than we think about and sometimes we don’t take into consideration that our days here on Earth are numbered. We go on with our busy schedules and we say, “Oh I forgot to call such and such.” and “ Well, they can wait.”
Another reason I bring this up is because on December 5, 2007 I lost one of my family members to cancer. Someone very, very close to me. My Nana was such a special lady and so full of love. I was very, very, very close to her! When I turned 17 I moved out-of-state and at times would forget to call her like I wanted to every night to remind her that I loved her. I didn’t see her often, but if she needed me there I was there. She asked me one night to come to her house to help her clean her carpets. When I arrived she was wearing oxygen and I wasn’t really sure what was going on. I had no idea that she was having any complications in her health. As I sat there at her table she began to tell me that they had found cancer. I wasn’t quite understanding what all was going on. All I could think was, “OMG!” OMG!” “OMG!” and ask how come she never told me that she had any health issues and that I thought she looked and acted as if she were doing quite well. I held it all in, but the tears wanted to explode from my eyes. After she told me all of that its like my mind went blank. I couldn’t remember anything else we did, although I do remember taking my camera out of my purse and loading my memory card up with pictures of us while she complained to me that she did not want her picture taken looking the way she did. I couldn’t help it. I had to have those pictures. Thanksgiving was right around the corner (like week or two away) and my Aunt Terri had made arrangements for all of us to gather at her home for Thanksgiving dinner. When I arrived Nana was there with her oxygen, but this time she was in a wheelchair and could barely walk. I sat next to her the majority of the time talking with her and telling her that I loved her. Before everyone was even finished eating she was ready to leave to go home and rest. I wheeled her out to the car and helped her in. A few days later I receive a call telling me that Nana had been put into the hospital on life support and that it didn’t look good. Finally, the tears decided they were no longer going to be contained and I lost it. I got there as quick as I could and for the whole time that she was in the hospital I was there every single day from morning to night. When she would come to from her induced coma we would write to her on paper and she would write us back. I’ll never forget that call on that Wed. morning of December 5, 2007 when they said that my Nana took her last breath and went peacefully. GOSH, I MISS HER!!!!
On Monday, it will make 4 years since cancer took her away from me and I don’t quite think that I have fully accepted it. Even after 4 years it just doesn’t seem real other than when I want to call her and talk to her or hear her voice and go to see her I can’t.
R.I.P. Nana Brockman! I love you so much!!!
